Ever After: A Cinderella Story

In the late 90's Drew Barrymore ruled big screen rom-coms.  She had just come off The Wedding Singer, was about to do Never Been Kissed and we needed her to get out of the 80's and get her Renaissance beauty into some lovely gowns and to die for shoes.

In Ever After Miss Barrymore plays the lead Cinderella inspired character.  The story starts traditional then veers off into it's own mix of French court meets girl-power territory.  Danielle [Cinderella] is a servant in her own home, terrorized by her evil stepmother and sisters until she runs into the crown prince and bewitches him with her feisty character and incredible hair.  Many miss-understandings in sue but [plot spoilers] he finally sees beyond her low status and treasures her inner qualities and it's a happy ever after ending.
 
Rating:  Ever After is a beautiful movie; the setting, costumes and cinematography are breathtaking but the values it espouses are beautiful too.  A strong and intelligent woman [Danielle] is presented in a positive light, and true love really does overcome all obstacles.  Great stuff.  We watch this movie every year or two when we feel a bit nostalgic and romantic and it never disappoints.  And if I haven't persuaded you yet - Angelica Houston is the most villainous step mother you will ever encounter!  Goosebumps!  That woman is brilliant... yet frightening!

Naughty bits: This movie is pretty tame but there are some things to be aware of for younger or more sensitive viewers.  Danielle is talked to badly by her family throughout the movie then sold to a very creepy neighbour.  She is whipped (you don't see it but you do see the aftermath) and the gypsy characters are a bit jump scary.  Finally there are a couple of kisses which scandalized our 6 year old "ewww they're eating each other" but that's about all folks.

Snacks: Chocolate

Family In-quotes: (after freaking out) "There was a bee!"

Related Goodies:
Other Cinderella inspired movies: Ella Enchanted and A Cinderella Story
Why Ever After is the best Cinderella movie ever

Monster House

I'm not a scary movie person but I thought "how scary could a kid's movie be right?"  It turns out that a kid's movie can be pretty scary! 

As Halloween draws near three friends are determined to uncover the secrets of the creepy house in their neighbourhood.  Their detective works leads them to uncover more than they bargained for.  Fear not dear parent, all is well that ends well but it is not without it's jump scares and creepy as moments.

 The CGI is not all that good but we got drawn into the story and atmosphere of the movie and didn't notice it after a while.

Rating: Monster House was a good movie and there was no way we saw the ending coming but it is not for the faint hearted.  We will probably watch it again sometime in the future for a few thrills around Halloween.

Naughty bits: If you and your older (10+) child enjoy scary things then you will like Monster House but your kid has to be a brave soul because this movie is seriously creepy!  Definitely NOT suitable for younger and sensitive children as they will have nightmares.  Monster House is rated PG but it's bordering on 13+.

Snacks: Individually wrapped candy

Family In-quotes: "Relax. Just be cool, like me"

Related Goodies:
Other kid's movies which turned out to be WAY more creepy than advertised:
Coraline
The Polar Express

The Spy Next Door

I've reviewed Jackie Chan's work before on this blog [see link below] but most of his films are not suitable for kids.  Teens perhaps then?  Yes, for sure, they'll love them!   But not so much for kids so when we saw his face pop up on the kid's Neflix feed we were happy to have a film of his to enjoy with a younger audience.

Jackie plays a spy who masquerades as a boring accountant? type when off duty.  He has a soft spot for his very attractive single mother neighbour played by Amber Valletta.  They go on a few dates, he yearns to take the relationship further but she is reluctant on account of her children and the abandonment of them by her previous partner.  To prove he is a man worthy of her trust he offers to babysit the kids while she visits a sick relative.

Due to one of the kid's meddling his work and home life collide, threatening the peaceful weekend he had planned.  Things escalate to the point where he must take the children away thus destroying all trust his neighbour had in him and quashing their budding relationship.  How will Jackie redeem this hopeless situation?  Well with household appliances, a dashing smile and kung fu of course!!


Rating: I'm very sad to report that this movie is close to un-watchable.  The script has ALL the worst movie tropes and annoying characters it can fit in.  The acting is not good but I think the blame lies with the director and writers on this one.  The poor actors just didn't have anything good to work with.  We will not watch this movie in it's entirety again.  This is one best watched as a highlights reel of all the best fights on YouTube because thankfully Jackie and his team do not disappoint there.

Naughty bits:  This is a Jackie Chan movie so there is lots of kung fu fighting.  Things happen to characters which would definitely kill or seriously maim them in real life so if you have younger children who are likely to imitate things they see on TV then this is not suitable for them.  But for everyone else, the violence is played out with all the cartoonish exaggeration of the Home Alone series.  *No stuntmen were seriously harmed in the making of this movie*

Snacks: Dumplings

Family In-quotes: "Nice hypothesis, but ya can't prove it"

Related Goodies:
A more mature but classic Jackie Chan Movie: Who Am I

Princess Protection Program

Some little girls don't care what they wear, some little girls are little princesses from day one.  Pink!  Poofy dresses!  Tiaras!  Fairy Wings!  All at once!  Kid 2 is the little princess in our family.  She loves pretty things and all things sweet and magical, with a bit of Pokemon thrown in for good measure.  One always needs a trusty Pokemon sidekick on one's adventures.  But I digress, back to princess business; and the protection of them.

It was a cold night and I wanted nothing more than to cuddle up in bed with kid 2 and indulge in a chick flick on the laptop.  Kid 2 was all in so we found Princess Protection Program on Netflix and gave it a shot.

Selena Gomez is just a regular small town teenager with small town problems until her secret agent father brings home an unexpected housemate.  The housemate turns out to be the crown princess of an obscure South American? (think Cuba) island and Selena's father has been charged with protecting her.  Selena is roped into training the princess (Ariana Grande) in the ways of the American teenager.  Things are rocky at first but the girls come to learn from each other and grow together. 

Rating: PPP is not a great movie; the plot and characters are very cookie cutter, but it's good enough watch once with your little princess.  You can admire pretty things together and get all girl powered up.  The one plot twist is that Selena and Ariana resist the urge to break into song mid-movie!

Naughty bits: Some of the relationship/crushing moments are more suitable for teen/tween viewers; only because a younger viewer will not understand what they are talking about, and will therefore be bored.  The rest is as clean as Selena Gomez's pearly whites.

Snacks: Cereal - that you make yourself

Family In-quotes: "I will turn the other cheek, because that is what princesses do"

Related Goodies:
A fairly similar but much better Princess movie: The Princess Diaries

Men in Black

In the late 90's Will Smith was the king of cinema and Men in Black is one of his best remembered blockbusters from this time period.  We remembered it being pretty fun so we dragged kid 1 down memory lane with us.

Smith plays an earnest cop who goes beyond the call of duty to get his guy but this time he gets more than he bargains for when his guy is not a guy, but an alien!  Shortly after this he is drafted into a super secret government agency whose job is to police the universe and all alien life; he becomes a Man in Black...  and part of this call of duty is to save the world, blah, blah blah... and save it he does!  With the help of his mentor Tommy Lee Jones, some fun alien tech and badass sunglasses.


What surprised us about Men in Black was that the special effects and humour held up pretty well.  Yeah the plot was paint-by-numbers but it was a pretty fun movie and we wished that more light hearted action movies like MIB and other 90's blockbusters were around today.



Rating: Like I said, we had a fun time!  And a fun enough time that we will probably watch MIB again in a few years time (with kid 2). 

Naughty bits: MIB is a more mature kids movie.  I would recommend your kid is in double digits before showing them. The language is a bit coarse, there is heaps of human vs. alien violence and the monster at the end is pretty gross and a bit scary.  Entomophobics beware; the bugs are plentiful and creepy crawly.

Snacks: Popcorn!  with green jelly

Family In-quotes: "Put up your arms and all your flippers!"

Related Goodies:
Men in Black spin off TV Series

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

This retelling of the classic children's picture book of the same name starts off pretty "paint by numbers irritating kid's movie" but give it a chance because as the family's bad day escalates so do the laughs.  By the end things are pretty surreal but hilarious and we were glad we persevered through the beginning.  And I really, really want a copy of Dick Van Dyke's book!  Nope, I'm not giving away the spoiler to that hint, you will have to find that comedy gold yourself.

Steve Carell and Jennifer Garner convincingly play 40 something parents struggling to balance mid life crisis', work and a bunch of school age kids and the kid actors are great too but Alexander's lisp is somewhat distracting (sorry kid!) rather than endearing.


Rating: We've never read the picture book so we enjoyed the movie for what it was.  We'll watch it again sometime in the future but likely to YouTube our favourite scenes more often.

Naughty bits: Alexander and the ... is suitable for above 5yrs or so.  There are lots of slapstick moments where characters appear to be injured (and would definitely be in real life) but no one is hurt so it's OK!  A little mild potty humour here and there spice things up a bit but overall a pretty clean family movie.  However nothing remains literally clean in this universe for long...

Snacks: Go out for Japanese BBQ together then come home and watch the movie.

Family In-quotes: "This day is so cursed"

Related Goodies:
The Book which inspired the movie

Incredibles 2

Some have argued that the golden age of Pixar is over and judging by their latest sequels (bar Toy Story 3) you would be inclined to agree.  So it was with a little trepidation that we took the morning off these school holidays to see Incredibles 2.  Would it disappoint like the Cars series?  Or would it pleasantly surprise us like Toy Story 3?

 Well... it lived up to it's name baby!  Incredibles 2 is pretty incredible.  A good story, great characters and plenty of action make for a great follow up to one of our favourite family movies.  Incredibles 2 picks up where part 1 left off and follows the family as they navigate politics, math and Jack Jack's new powers (OK spoiler alert but it's in the trailers!).

As we walked into the cinema there were multiple warnings that the film contains flashing sequences which could trigger epilepsy or sensory conditions and they are to be taken seriously!  This film is pretty full on and if the flashing sequences don't trigger your kid then the non-stop action may do.  However we loved the world of the Incredibles and the production design of part 2 is so cool.  I also want to live in a futuristic 1960's with today's modern technology!

Rating: We really enjoyed Incredibles 2 and will definitely watch it again when it hits digital release.  The chemistry between the family members is so spot on and makes you want to be one of Bob and Helen's kids just to be a part of it.

Naughty bits: See trigger warning above plus there is HEAPS of fighting in this movie.  More than the previous one!  Also a couple of sequences of sinister looking characters so I don't think Incredibles 2 is suitable for very young or sensitive children.  My youngest at 5years loved it but she is not sensitive at all LOL

Snacks: Chocolate chip cookies

Family In-quotes: "Num num, cookie!"

Related Goodies:
The Incredibles original movie.  ESSENTIAL viewing!